Cheating Jerk Follow Up . . .

I’ve been avoiding the topic of the big cheating jerk I dated from April to July (Refer to my “Dear Daphne” blog post if I lost you.) But I figured I’d revisit the topic at least one more time. You see, I just finished the book Resilience by Elizabeth Edwards. That woman is the epitome of grace. She endured much in this life: the tragic death of her teenage son, breast cancer, and the humiliating public betrayal of her husband of thirty years, Senator John Edwards.

For anyone facing any kind of adversity, I highly recommend you run, not walk, to Barnes and Noble and buy Elizabeth's words.

Therefore, in the style of this classy lady, I didn't want to give the cheater in my life too much attention on my blog. Mainly because I believe in positive energy. And this guy is so screwed up and so dysfunctional that there’s nothing positive about him. But the truth is there’s been a positive twist to the story.

And that twist is Daphne.

For once she and I were done discovering all the disgusting details, “He called you Blondie, too?!?!” we discovered something better.

A friendship.

In between moments of revelation, “What? He had pictures of the two of you on Facebook? I could only see two pictures on his page. He told me he didn't know how to really use Facebook! Good gawd, that man had his privacy settings Mac Daddy'd out!!" and epiphany realizations that we were intimate with him simultaneously (which, by the way, is the universal human definition of a dog) we eventually dug out of those discussions and found our way to more mundane commonalities.

Like similar careers, taste in clothes, and a love for wine and food.

We were soon giggling like school girls over lunch and checking in often via text and phone. I’ve even introduced Daphne to a couple guys with whom I think there may be some intriguing potential. (Just call me cupid!)

It’s nice to see her smiling.

I have a feeling Daphne will be a permanent fixture in my life and I feel so incredibly blessed.

Discovering I was being betrayed and used was not fun but the outcome is something I never would have expected. I found a kindred spirit and wonderful friend in the process. On top of that, this shared experience had helped both of us to discern that the shortcomings of others is not something we ever have been or will be able to control and is no way a reflection of our failings.

We are trusting and loving women and those are qualities we are both holding on to. This man was out for power and that was it. But he didn't get it and he didn't win. Because we will not allow him to steal our trust in others.

Elizabeth Edwards offers an acute assessment of situations like this in her book. Sometimes things happen to you that are tragic. Tragedy is sometimes unavoidable.

But it is an honorable place.

As the alternative is to be on the side that she puts her husband's mistress. And where Daphne and I put this man and his misguided motivations.

Pathetic.